The Neverending ALF Story - ALF Animated Adventures Edition!

[ALFanatic]

"AT Ease Tank", ordered Sgt. Warbgood to the snarling, hissing Orbit Guard mascot who was the biggest, meanest, and ugliest cat ALF had ever seen.

[Admin]

ALF was slightly intimidated by the cat, but even though it was ugly all he could think about was how tasty and juicy it must be!

[ALFanatic]

Seeing the look in ALF's eyes that betrayed his thoughts, Sgt. Warbgood yelled at a volume loud enough to bring rain, "Mess with Tank boy, and you'll be the sorriest Melmacian that ever lived."

Mike

[QueenofMelmac]

Alf thought to himself, How am I going to get through this training without giving into temptation to sink my teeth into that darn cat?

[ALFanatic]

ALF's tasty thought was abruptly terminated by the thunder of Sgt. Warbgood's question, " I say again son, and I realy hate repeating myself, what's your purpose schlepping around the OGTC like some kind of Marnuvian river rat?"

Mike

[QueenofMelmac]

Alf regained his composure and replied, "well i'm here to become the best orbit guard on the planet....or you could just give me one of those nifty uniforms and i'll just get out of your hair! whadda ya say?"

[ALFanatic]

Sgt. Warbgood (who if I forgot to mention was more than two times ALF's height) knelt down on one knee, so that he had direct eye contact with ALF, and stated, "We don't give out no OG uniforms in husky size to chubby boys - the only way you'll ever get an OG uniform is to undergo and graduate from 21 months of rigorous recruit training - then, and only then, we custom fit an OG unifrom to your manly body - ready to sign some papers?"

Mike

[Admin]

ALF replied, "I don't know...can I get a refund if I don't lose the weight???"

[QueenofMelmac]

"This isn't some guaranteed weight loss program-now sign the papers or get lost", the Sgt yelled.

[Admin]

"Okay, but I need to talk to my attorney first." replied ALF.

[QueenofMelmac]

At that moment, the Mascot Cat appeared behind Alf and then the Sgt said "there's your lawyer now sign or get on your way-i have no time for this nonsense"

[QueenofMelmac]

So Alf then said "ok what the heck" and signed the papers and the Huge Cat shows Alf to his room which would be his room for the next 2 months.

[ALFanatic]

In the Guard now, ALF starts to say, "Mr. Kitty", to which Tank instantaneously hisses the command, "Address me as Chief Mascot, twerp!"

Mike

[QueenofMelmac]

Alf then realized he had to take this seriously and at that point there was an announcement for lunch and Alf was excited because he was starving and wanted to meet and greet his fellow Orbit Guard members.

[ALFanatic]

In response to lunch call, Tank double-time marches the salivating new recruit 1500 meters to the Mess Hall where the assembled company of "SHAVED" recruits are already chowing down of fried Spam.

Mike

[Admin]

"What's this?" asked ALF, "I thought Orbit Guards were supposed to get fancy meals? After all, we ARE the ones guarding the orbits...whether they need it or not. I'm going to complain about this!"

[ALFanatic]

Swatting ALF in the face, with his long, muscular tail to assure attention, Chief Mascot Tank snarls, "Maybe you can complain to your Mommy later Porky, after you plant your butt over there at the fat table for a healthy, nutrious bowl of boiled carrots."

Mike

[Admin]

"Are they buttered?" asked ALF. Instead of answering, Tank swatted ALF again.

[QueenofMelmac]

Alf finished his lunch and then proceeded to his room where he met his roomate "Bubba" who was well known in the facility for talking excessively about shrimp and can easily make your ears bleed by talking nonstop; driving his roomates to pure insomnia.

[ALFanatic]

Amazingly, before "Bubba" even got the opportunity to speak, ALF hysterically asked two joined questions of utmost personal importance, "What's with the SHAVING?", and "How long until dinner?"

Mike